What do fly halves drink before a game?
A kicking tea.
Wednesday 30 November 2016
#1995
A: Why was there no post yesterday?
B: The writer resisted an attack by a taxidermist.
A: Okay, that has nothing to do with the missing post. This time you're really not making any-
B: He couldn't be stuffed!
B: The writer resisted an attack by a taxidermist.
A: Okay, that has nothing to do with the missing post. This time you're really not making any-
B: He couldn't be stuffed!
Monday 28 November 2016
#1994
Employer: So you want to be a comic book character?
Auditionee: Yes I do!
Employer: Well then, you're going to have to strip!
Audtionee: Oh no. My dreams and my dignity.
Auditionee: Yes I do!
Employer: Well then, you're going to have to strip!
Audtionee: Oh no. My dreams and my dignity.
Sunday 27 November 2016
#1993
Judy always assumed that whatever people said to her was related to the shoreline; she had a tendency to take things littorally.
Saturday 26 November 2016
#1992
Celeste's audience was stunned by the precision of her pencil; truly, her sharpening skills were on point.
Friday 25 November 2016
Thursday 24 November 2016
Wednesday 23 November 2016
Tuesday 22 November 2016
Monday 21 November 2016
Sunday 20 November 2016
Saturday 19 November 2016
#1985
The tailor never held a grudge; he always felt that it was better to build a britch and get over it.
Friday 18 November 2016
#1984
People from countries with fiery cuisine often fall sick when travelling abroad, due to the sudden lack of spice in their diet. This is known as blandular fever.
Thursday 17 November 2016
#1983
What do you call the feeling when insects build you up but then are disappointing?
An ant-iclimax.
An ant-iclimax.
Wednesday 16 November 2016
Tuesday 15 November 2016
Sunday 13 November 2016
Saturday 12 November 2016
#1978
What do you call it when you remove the part of someone's brain that recognises plants?
A lobotany.
A lobotany.
Friday 11 November 2016
Thursday 10 November 2016
Wednesday 9 November 2016
Tuesday 8 November 2016
Monday 7 November 2016
#1973
After the Japanese attacks, concerns of sensitivity forced the US government to cancel its plan to rename Pearl Harbour as Bombay.
Sunday 6 November 2016
#1972
Which politicians primarily focus on policies surrounding jam?
Members of the Conserve-ative party.
Members of the Conserve-ative party.
Saturday 5 November 2016
#1971
What did the altar server say to the priest after diluting the communion wine?
"Forgive me father, for I have thinned."
"Forgive me father, for I have thinned."
Friday 4 November 2016
#1970
"So yes, I can organise a private locomotive, just for you, whenever you need it."
Ellan sighed. She was beginning to realise that the readers of her local paper, while apparently well-connected in the public transport industry, had seriously misunderstood what she meant by "seeking a personal trainer".
Ellan sighed. She was beginning to realise that the readers of her local paper, while apparently well-connected in the public transport industry, had seriously misunderstood what she meant by "seeking a personal trainer".
Thursday 3 November 2016
Wednesday 2 November 2016
Tuesday 1 November 2016
#1967
The presidential candidate, criticised for her sternness, attempted to soften her gaze using a tender-eyes-er.
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