Friday, 30 September 2016


What animals, when placed in circles, can help humans to navigate?


Thursday, 29 September 2016


Nathan was a little hurt by the criticism of his helmet strap design, but he took it on the chin.

Wednesday, 28 September 2016


What do you a feeling of shock experienced when one's cookware has been stolen?


Tuesday, 27 September 2016


What do you call a mannequin of a fully grown dog?

A dogget.

Monday, 26 September 2016


What do you call a regrettable piece of gossip?

A rue-mour.

Sunday, 25 September 2016


What kind of fuel is best for creating flames that dance in the cold, cold night?


Saturday, 24 September 2016


The salt grains screamed in agony as they were ground into tiny pieces; it was a cruel twist of fate.

Friday, 23 September 2016


Where do wine makers celebrate victories?

In their win-yards.


A: Why was there no post yesterday?

B: The writer was involved in a heist at a car parts dealer.

A: What do you-?

B: He was instructed to take a brake.

Wednesday, 21 September 2016


What do you call two heads of schools who are friends with each other?


Tuesday, 20 September 2016


A leaky pen had ruined the calligrapher's lifetime of work; she didn't like to talk about the inkcident.

Monday, 19 September 2016


What do botany students use for writing tasks?

Loose leaf.

Sunday, 18 September 2016


What do you call a horrible disaster in which a hunter removes a feline's backside?

A cat-ass-trophy.

Saturday, 17 September 2016


Why did the pig want to leave its enclosure?

It felt sty-fled.

Friday, 16 September 2016


What kind of chocolates can be used to taunt people at shopping centres?


Thursday, 15 September 2016


What did Vivaldi call the secret combination of herbs and spices that constituted his original recipe chicken meal?

Four Seasonings.

Wednesday, 14 September 2016


What swamp-dwelling plants can be used to clean toilets?

Bog brush.

Tuesday, 13 September 2016


Which film director is referred to by all teachers of film studies when marking assessments?

Stanley Rubric.

Monday, 12 September 2016


What kind of ghosts haunt their celebrity crushes?


Sunday, 11 September 2016


Where is the best place to cremate plants?

In a fern-ace.

Saturday, 10 September 2016

Friday, 9 September 2016


"President Trump, in hindsight, do you have any regrets about building your wall on the Mexican border?"

"No regrets. Not even Juan."

Thursday, 8 September 2016


Which Soviet politician was famous for training horses in snow sports?


Wednesday, 7 September 2016


"Your Majesty, how do you feel about the theft of your royal seat?"

"I'm not sure how I feel. I guess I'm just a bit throne."

Tuesday, 6 September 2016

Monday, 5 September 2016


What do you call it when farm animals send their meals back to the kitchen?

Giving feedback.


A: Why was there no post yesterday?

B: The writer realised that he had two family commitments at once.

A: It was Father's Day?

B: And it was also a Son-Day.

Saturday, 3 September 2016


What popular 1960s dance song is about gymnastics injuries?

Twist and Shout

Friday, 2 September 2016


After 40 years as a butcher, Beth had grown accustomed to the daily rind.

Thursday, 1 September 2016


What film tells the story of a savant who memorises his city's sewage system?

Drain Man