Saturday, 31 October 2015


What do you call the process of slowly savouring a sauce?


Friday, 30 October 2015


What do you call a lot of people going to confession?

A sinflux.

Thursday, 29 October 2015


What kind of stick does an old sugar daddy use to walk?

A cane.

Wednesday, 28 October 2015


What do you call a forceful declaration about white blood cells?

A lymphatic statement.

Tuesday, 27 October 2015


What do you call the state of being worried about one's printing supplies?


Monday, 26 October 2015


Teacher: Define chamber music.

Student: Chamber music is when you play from the heart.

Sunday, 25 October 2015


What do you call people who have lost their eyesight on Italian canals?

Venetian blinds.

Saturday, 24 October 2015


What do you call someone who was born into wealth?


Friday, 23 October 2015


Proponents of a ban on burkas have been accused of slit-shaming.

Thursday, 22 October 2015


Cordelia was always very careful about the ropes on her ship; some would say that she was excessively rig-ourous.

Wednesday, 21 October 2015


Which musical genre is best known for its associated facial hairstyles?


Tuesday, 20 October 2015


Upon escaping from the pirate's clutches, Linn happily realised that she was off the hook.

Monday, 19 October 2015


The police in Singapore are known for their strict enforcement of littering laws; they will fine someone at the drop of a hat.

Sunday, 18 October 2015


A: My credit card says I've purchased a bunch of livestock! What do I do?

B: For starters, don't have a cow.

Saturday, 17 October 2015


The society of Youtubers against Food Wastage asked people not to subscribe to How To Basic - as this would only egg him on further.

Friday, 16 October 2015


The engineers had designed the train to move especially fast; it was their express purpose.

Thursday, 15 October 2015


How do strippers judge their popularity?

Based on their performance on the poles.

Wednesday, 14 October 2015


The faulty door was driving the carpenters crazy; they were starting to become unhinged.

Tuesday, 13 October 2015


To bond with someone, change trains with them; it's a great way to make a connection.

Monday, 12 October 2015


Which boy band was named after the inability of its members to reverse a car?

One Direction.

Sunday, 11 October 2015


The potato storeroom had been burgled in a mash and grab attack.

Saturday, 10 October 2015


All thieves of baked goods were terrible, reflected the detective, but this one really took the biscuit.

Friday, 9 October 2015


After her fetish for concealing felines in sacks became too suspicious, Brigitte decided to let the cat out of the bag.

Thursday, 8 October 2015


A: How was the rocket launch?

B: Great! We had a blast.

Wednesday, 7 October 2015


A: Oh no! I forgot to bring her coat!

B: No wonder she's been giving you the cold shoulder.

Tuesday, 6 October 2015


After struggling to name the period during which the sun is visible, the astronomers decided to call it a day.

Monday, 5 October 2015


The mystery of the missing clothes hampers was ruining the detective; these unsolved thefts were turning her into a basket case.

Sunday, 4 October 2015


As the organiser of the judges' dance, Kayna felt distinctly uncomfortable that had not been able to afford an external venue; she was unsure how to proceed now that the ball was in her court.

Saturday, 3 October 2015

Friday, 2 October 2015


What song of peace is favoured by hairdressers?


Thursday, 1 October 2015