#1905

Why don't students fall for each other when they live at the same school?

Because love knows no boarders.

#1904

When do electricians feel like rock stars?

When they work with power cords.

#1903

Why couldn't the children give away their old blocks?

It was impossible to Lego.

#1902

Billy the hangman was really quite shy in his private life, but on execution days, the public only saw his flamboyant halter ego.

#1901

What sauce can never be served hot?

A coulis.

#1900

What do you call an digital update that informs you when a fight between friends is over?

A no-tiff-ication.

#1899

A: Why was there no post yesterday?

B: The special effects department was on strike.

A: We don't have a special-

B: There were delays in post production.

#1898

What do you call a union protesting about changes to workers' rights that they think might happen in the future?

A preemptive strike.

#1897

Would do you call a person's dreams of becoming a smoker?

Ash-pirations.

#1896

What do you call mucking around by the edge of a window?

Being sill-y.

#1895

A: Why was there no post yesterday?

B: The writer took a day off to consider monetising this blog, in order to make us appreciate it more.

A: Why would that-

B: Adsense makes the heart grow fonder.

#1894

What television show details the adventures of a group of fine arts and memorabilia specialists driven to a psychotic frenzy?

Frantics Roadshow.

#1893

What do you call a massive number of antelopes?

A gazelle-ion.

#1892

What did the announcer say when the dried herbs were ready to be judged?

"It's crunch thyme."

#1891

What do you call an independent, self-managed clerk who organises transactions between fishermen and the public?

A shoal trader.

#1890

What kind of fish gives the best hugs?

A cuddle-fish.

#1889

If the ferryman won't carry you across the river Styx, how can you get to Hades?

In a hell-icopter.

#1888

What do you call an independent, self-managed clerk who manages deals with the devil?

A soul trader.

#1887

What do you call artificial gas processing micro-sacs designed for human lungs?

Valve-oli.

#1886

What do you call a stash of moonshine?

An alco-haul.

#1885

What did the wrestler say after reversing a hold?

"I guess the choke's on you."

#1884

Which British prime minister fixed all the roofs at trading events in public squares?

Market Thatcher.

#1883

Which John Denver song was told from the perspective of a government statistician?

"You fill up my census..."

#1882

How do sour cherries in open pastry taste?

Tart.

#1881

To the socially conscious narrator, the lack of any great surge in action to lower carbon emissions seemed distinctly anti-climatic.

#1880

What do you call it when derision has gotten out of hand?

Running a-mock.

#1879

What feminine hygiene product is made out of chocolate biscuit by-products?

Tim-Tampons.

#1878

What do you call the destruction of a cabbage-based salad?

Slaw-ter.

#1877

Which companion of Robin Hood was in charge of plastic surgery for the Merry Men?

Friar Nip-and-Tuck.

#1876

What was the favourite garment of the Greek god of healing?

A polo.

#1875

Why did the plumber give the greengrocer an enormous quote?

There were leeks all over his shop.