#144

Oh, he has a speech impediment? And all along I just thought that he was a really good rapper.

#143

A: So you say that you are filled with fresh vigour and eagerness, and that you have discovered a small country near Australia?

B: Yes indeed! I have found new zeal and New Zealand.

#142

Jugglers commence their act by vomiting. In order to juggle, they must throw it up first.

#141

Which coastal bird used his martial arts skills to gain a Hollywood career?

Steven Seagull.

#140

The butcher loved to meat new people. He would then add them on Facebook and pork them.

#139

"Eggs! Why?" said a bee.

XYZAB

#138

A: You must dress formally.

B: Who's Mally? And why am I dressing for this person?

#137

Fish can't climb trees, but they can scale buildings.

#136

We have nothing to eat but food itself.

#135

In the Wizard of Oz, the Tin Man always adopted a Can-Do attitude.

#134

A: There's a dead bug on my desk.

B: That sounds pretty fly.

#133

What is the technical term for using a map and compass to navigate terrain in Asia?

Orient-eering.

#132

A: So you hate Asians and Taylor Swift?

B: Yeah, I guess I just don't like people with narrow eyes.

#131

A: You know that woman who makes bridal outfits? She keeps saying things that indirectly sound as if she wants to cause me some harm.

B: So she who threads veils also veils threats.

#130

I can't believe that you left it switched off. That is simply not on.

#129

You tortured him with the inner thread of a candle? That's horribly wicked!

#128

I am carefully avoiding any discussion regarding the telescope. If someone tries to talk to me about it, I will reply, "No comet."

#127

I enrolled in cooking classes and film classes, but neither panned out as I'd expected.

#126

I expect everyone to line up patiently for the seafood buffet. There's no need to clamour.

#125

What syndrome causes humans to sprout the soft feathers which are usually found on young birds?

Down Syndrome.

#124

Anger, pure, unadulterated anger

Coursed through its veins,
Raging within, as it scurried
Over the dog's back,
Searching for a hairless patch that would
Soon be the entry point

Through which it would
Insert its hypostome, and
Consume until it
Keeled over, filled with blood and fury.

#123

A: Did you click on it?

B: No, but I gave it a cursory glance.

#122

Some ancient legends entertain me, but not all. They're a bit hit and myth.

#121

Despite its name, cosplay rarely has anything to do with lettuce.

#120

What is the battle anthem of the Chinese navy?

Yellow Submarine.